Strong, firm and steadfast...

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."  1 Peter 5:10

Sometimes I have a minor set back in my thinking.  Does this ever happen to you?  One minute you're traveling along minding your own business, doing well, feeling fine the next minute you're completely bombarded with feelings of hopelessness and fatigue?

I don't know if this is the normal course with nerve damage, but one day I'm doing well and the next day I'm hurting so badly I feel as if I've not made any progress at all.  I know this doesn't only relate to physical pain, but also to emotional stress, hormonal imbalances, daily trials and even to those I lovingly refer to as 'button pushers.'  Some days we can deal with it and keep going and other days....well, it's hard!

As I continue to heal from the surgery I often become frustrated that I could have gone through so much: chemotherapy, complete reconstructive surgery, physical therapy, and still have so far to go.  I had 'planned' on a six week recovery.  Next week will be three months.  I'm still recovering.  I'm not happy about this.  I had my plan.  I had ideas of what I wanted to do and accomplish over the summer.  I had things on my to do list.

But then I stop and I look again at 1 Peter 5:10.  ""And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."  Three things stand out to me in this promise.

First, "after you have suffered a little while..."  When I went back to the infusion center last week I was overwhelmed at the emotions that came flooding back.  I was also keenly aware of the blessing I've been given.  After an 8 month journey, I am cancer free.  Cancer free!  My prognosis was anywhere from 50% survival at best to 22% survival at worst.  To say that I am cancer free is, as my doctor so tearfully put it, "nothing short of a miracle."  As I sat down last week for port maintenance I saw and recognized faces that I first saw eight months ago.  Those people are still going through the battle; they are still in the trenches.  I have suffered, make no mistake.  But God has been gracious to allow it to be for "a little while."

The second thing that stands out to me is "will himself restore you."  There are many examples in scripture where God sent an angel or a messenger or a plague or a storm...but in this particular instance, after we have suffered a little while, God himself will restore.  There must be a special place in his heart of those who suffer.  He could easily send a ministering angel, or a spirit of comfort.  He could easily speak restoration into being.  But in the instance of suffering, God himself will restore.  

The third thing that is so precious to me is that he will "make you strong, firm and steadfast."  I must admit, I long to be strong and firm again.  Of course that's speaking physically.  To think that last October I was posting to Facebook about the nine milers I was running...now I can barely walk up the stairs or stroll through the mall.  I desire to be strong and firm again.  I want to run those nine-milers again.  However, spiritually speaking, the suffering, pain, fear and threat of death has given me the opportunity to be strong, firm and steadfast.  I am stronger now than I was before.  I am firmer in what I believe now than I was before.  I am more steadfast than I was before.  For these things I am thankful.  

It occurs to me that no matter what suffering we are personally going through the promise is the same: "After you have suffered a little while, [God] will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."  As we sway through the ups and downs of normal life hearing this promise and waiting for the outcome is difficult.  But His promises are true, God is always faithful and He is always on time!  We simply have to wait through the "little while" in order to experience the heavenly restoration.

Only By His Grace,

Billie