Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Looking back...

Do you ever get caught in a flurry of activity only to look back and stand amazed at all you've done?  These past four months have been that way for me.  So much so that I feel like I'm finally taking a slow deep breath.

This month alone I have had 8 doctor appointments with 5 different doctors, had tubes removed, in-office procedures, PET scans, infusions and lab work.  Last week I had three appointments with three different doctors...in one week!  

I'm ready to sit back and enjoy some time to recover.  I intend to take a leave of absence from work in the near future and spend some time spring cleaning and organizing my home before surgery.
I want to start to write.  I want to journal and record some of my experiences for future reference.  I want to sit in the sun and absorb some much needed sun rays and soft spring breezes.  I want to take walks with my kids and just breathe a little.  

I said a couple weeks ago that I was in a place of being still before the Lord.  I still feel this way.  I feel like I've waged war against this cancer for four solid months and now I'm just resting in His goodness, beside still and peaceful waters.  

I am blessed everyday with the acute knowledge that this life is short.  I feel like I've been given a very tangible, yet invisible gift.  It seems like the sun shines a little brighter, the skies are a little bluer, the breezes are a little softer and rest is a little more peaceful.

I am so thankful for God's grace during this journey.  There is still a very long road ahead.  He has been faithful throughout every step of the way and He will continue to be faithful.

Thank you to everyone who has prayed for us along the way...please keep praying.  We have a very radical surgery ahead - and a long recovery process afterward.  I will write more about that when I have more details.  Right now, we appreciate every single prayer.  God's grace is sufficient!

Only By His Grace,

Billie

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